“Even if she’s no beauty, dear God pls give her a good brain.”
who would’ve thought that an off-the-cuff, half-baked thought, in the middle of the night, typed out in the haze of slumber, in the confines of a text bar for 140 characters, would spark such controversy.
the scene: mother nursing her baby girl who was falling asleep in the comfort of a suckled bosom, her lids drooping heavily, drifting away to dreamland, sweet and innocent, right down to her tiny toenails.
looking at her, her big round head and funny-looking hair (what we call “mad scientist hair”, especially when it’s all wiry with sweat), her little button nose (in malay, you’d call it “pesek” or flat) and her perpetually drooling lips, her barely there eyebrows and lashes – the mother swells with nothing short of pride that this little being in her arm is “JUST SO CUTE!” that she repeats it like a broken record every day to her husband for affirmation, and receives it with a nod of agreement and a fatherly grin each time.
coz let’s face it, in every parent’s (very) biased world, their child/ren ARE the cutest.
but rationale being a bitch, they know that to say it out loud often enough to anyone else would appear presumptuous to the point of obnoxious.
and well, we wouldn’t want THAT, would we, now?
so mother downplays it.
yeah, baby doesn’t have curly locks of hair. she doesn’t have fluttery doll-like lashes. her nose isn’t sharp, neither is her chin. she doesn’t have a dimple in her cheek. and so, through absolutely no fault on her part, she has little of the features associated with your quintessential beauty.
which is all well and fine, coz that’s all part of your DNA, baby. god knows mummy herself looked funny as a baby (with pictures to prove).
the thing that really matters, is that she is adorable to me, to no end. couldn’t you guess from the infinite number of photos and anecdotes streamed through our various platforms of communication?
but at this point, and mostly in the future, it is a mother’s utmost wish that this girl will worry little about the superficial, and hone her more worthy God-given faculty of the mind and intelligence, to make the right choices and decisions, to better herself and acquire everything she will ever need in life through that. as PCK would say, though in quite a different context, “use your blain!”
and all that, my friends, was what mother meant to convey, albeit pathetically, in a 140 character tweet. (yes, i over-think things, that’s my dysfunction. annoying as hell, i know.)
but if you even bothered reading between the lines in the first place, if you knew me well enough, as i would expect you, a non-stranger, to – you would never, EVER, for a moment think that i would intentionally ‘insult’ my child through a compressed one-liner to convey my innermost thoughts.
then again, i guess i never should’ve attempted in the first place, coz the fact that you think i’d even do such a thing, is an insult in itself.









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oh my! Those who thinks otherwise are just narrow up there. Even I say that all the time to my husband. So does that mean I’m insulting my girl too?
no matter what triggered this, i’m glad you wrote the entry. it is obvious how your face lights up every mention of her or Aniq that you love them silly. and maybe only that matters? perhaps your friend had a bad-reading day.
Oooh. It sucks when people don’t give u the benefit of the doubt… even more if it’s someone who kinda knows you. Because I mean, that’s the bare minimum you’d expect from someone to whom you’re not a stranger, right? (Actually I’d want the benefit of the doubt EVEN from a stranger, so what more a non-stranger.) But I’m guessing the fact that you’re not strangers means the situation may be kinda tense/awkward right now. So I hope THAT passes soon… (unless u guys hardly meet lah… then aiya too bad so sad no regrets la hor)
Hey at least you’ve a blog to expound on the context of the tweet! You shouldn’t had had to explain, but since you did, hopefully the person gets it now and won’t be too proud to admit they made a harsh (mis)judgment and then you guys can live happily ever after : ) OK OBVIOUSLY I OVER-THINK THINGS TOO. END OF ESSAY GOODNIGHT.
ps: (ok NOT end of essay) for what it’s worth, I saw yr subsequent @ replies to people after the tweet in question this morning (cos I was thinking ‘what an out of the blue tweet…’ so nak find out context lah!) and I *did* think your overall mood was pretty pensive, aside from the good at parking jokes… so while I didn’t think u were ‘insulting’ auni initially anyway, i got an even better sense tt u were concerned and wanting the best for Auni, and nowhere near insulting her, or whatever
it actually seemed almost melancholic to me… but then, i can cry watching home makeover shows ;d
foodie alert: kak, good news for you. theres no need to go to kl ikea anymore for halal swedish meatballs. theres a newly open halal swedish cafe in spore. and their interior is vavavoom. see for yourself.http://tasjoakim.blogspot.com/2009/07/sneak-peak-of-fika-swedish-cafe-bistro.html
anyway, auni IS the cutest. i love the look of her hair..awww!
your anak is already pandai and smart lah kak.
*most* mothers will want the best for their child & it becomes a prayer, a constant one. the fact that some people misconstrued your words as a form of insult, well…
from the way you write about your children, we have an inkling of how much you dote on them, adore them, whathaveyous…rest easy
your conscience is clear
I still love auni, babe! To me, she’s the cutest and there’s no doubt about it!!! ((:
i only have to say this, those ppl hv no humour lah. ppl expect us to puji our kids all the time issit? nanti kata perasan pulak? if we downplay it abit, kata insulting pulak? macam2 lah!
Auni is the cutest baby ever!! The more pesek the betta!! Less hair? so what? babies are cute with or without!! *can wear cute hairband some more*
PS : When I saw the tweet…..my heart says “that’s a mum who wants the best for her children”
alahai…..i was a botak babygirl back then…and my mom told me, everyone tot i was a boy…and i guess my daughter followed my botakness as a babygirl…
she was with little hair…i didn’t bother what others said la….but i did use this indian minyak rambut (my inlaws suggested repeatedly la)…and it seemed to work..only problem it was oily n stink abit…lol
eventually her hair did grow slowlyyyyy……n there’s a bit of curls….and i chopped off her curls as it itched her neck terribly…in returned got a big scolding from hubby for murdering her daughter’s curl…
but i don’t mind at all….as now she is back to growing her hair slowly…
and i don’t even need to comb her hair…lol just use my hand to smoothe it out je….hehehe….its not the case of lazyness..just not enough…
=)
dun worry hana….auni is beautiful. love watching her with those headbands….make sure to keep wearing them…coz one day, she might just refuse it. like my daughter… =)
take care
ok.. i very the tertinggal bas. i saw that tweet and thot… wait i thot nothing of it. ok per doa tu. sapa tak nak anak pandai? i think pandai goes a MUCH longer way than cantik. i’d say things like that too if i had kids! biar aku cakap pasal anak aku jer, jgnlah nak cakap pasal anak org. didnt think such a ‘thot’ will create a controversy! nonsense tau! all i can say is that… these kind of ppl need to get out more, see more, experience more, READ more, OPEN more. it’s the 21st century. the thinking process shd hv evolved by now! oh and along the way perhaps pick up a sense of humor or two. ;p