the blistering heat didn’t deter us from a bit of sizzling good time at the zoo on a public holiday. if we were on a giant grill, we’d have been pretty well done. auni’s toasted button nose and my broiled bare shoulders are your tender juicy evidence.

it was altogether a pretty good day nonetheless, as mentioned. if the children are happy, i’m happy. of course, happiness doesn’t come without a bit of prior warning. warning which sounded like this:

me: aniq, pls promise me two things today. 1) don’t make adik fall or cry. 2) don’t make mummy angry. promise?

aniq: promise.

they were pretty much kept on this particular day. when his sister fell on her own accord, he was quick to jump to his (self-)defence – “not me! not me! HIM!” (no, he’s not placing the blame on an imaginary assailant. he’s just still a little confused with gender-specific pronouns.)

on the boat ride at the zoo, he volunteered to carry around a snake skin for the rest of the passengers to touch and feel. before that, he was asked the two basic questions from the boat guide.

guide: what’s your name?

him (and by him, i mean the above-mentioned boy, as i am perfectly versed in assigning gender-specific pronouns, except with cross-dressers and transvestites, which are a different thing altogether, and i am meandering so far away from the course of my story now): aniq!

guide: how old are you?

him: 3 year old! (pls pardon his flawed application of plurals as well. he is only 3 years old after all.)

anyway, later on, as we were walking out of the zoo, the daddy and i quizzed him again, oh, for the heck of it.

us: what is your name?

him: aniq.

us: how old are you?

him: 3 year old.

us: where do you stay?

him: i stay inside my house.

me: HAHAHAHAHHAHAAAHAHA!

him: (in all seriousness.) *pause* mummy, not funny. not funny.

me: HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

daddy: aniq, next time say ‘tampines’.

him: pampinis.

kidzworld was crazy with kids running amok amidst the sprays and splashes of water, while the adults pretended to tend to the children but were actually secretly enjoying the cool swirls of water on their feet.

the girl made a bee-line to the water jets and never looked back.

sports illustrated – not!

i’ll keep a look out for the now-baby prawn’s smokin’ tan lines. speaking of which, she received at least 2 bikinis on her birthday. tiny, barely legal triangle pieces that would make even britney spears blush. i was tempted to try them on myself… but i digress. in any case, we’ll definitely have to make more trips to the pool, if only to make full use of her entire range of swimwear.

last but not least, thank you hidaya, who’s been a great ambassador to the zoo!

i think i remember ayu once said, in one of our crazy discussions on career choices, that she’d like to work at the zoo, even if it’s just to chop vegetables for the animals. looking at the people who actually work at the zoo, i think that might actually be pretty fun. i’d love to be able to talk to an audience like the animal show presenters there, they’re pretty impressive.

fellow zoolanders

ok, it’s almost 3am and my shoulders are tingly. i really should’ve heeded baz luhrmann’s advice and wear sunscreen.

which brings me now to copy and paste that brilliant song of his, which was, technically, not really sung, more like monotonously delivered, but brilliant nonetheless.

The Sunscreen Song

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of ’97

Wear sunscreen

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be
it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by
scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable
than my own meandering experience… I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not
understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded.
But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and
recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before
you and how fabulous you really looked…. You’re not as fat as you
imagine.

Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as
effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing
bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that
never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm
on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing everyday that scares you

Sing

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with
people who are reckless with yours.

Floss

Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes
you’re behind… the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with
yourself.

Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you
succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your
life… the most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they
wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year
olds I know still don’t.

Get plenty of calcium.

Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone.

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children, maybe
you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky
chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary… whatever you do, don’t
congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either – your
choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s.

Enjoy your body, use it every way you can… don’t be afraid of it, or what
other people think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own..

Dance… even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.

Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for
good.

Be nice to your siblings; they are the best link to your past and the
people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you
should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and
lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you
knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live
in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will
philander, you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize
that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were
noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund,
maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one
might run out.

Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you’re 40, it will
look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who
supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of
fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the
ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen…

This entry was posted on Saturday, May 2nd, 2009 at 3:04 am and is filed under Antics, Friends, Music, Places. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.