the past few nights, after everyone’s asleep, i’ve been up in arms with scissors, coloured paper, blue tack, scotch tape, and an assortment of stationery i’ve not laid hands on since my school days.

macam art project ok.

the deadline is near, can pass up on time or not?

i *think* i may be going slightly bonkers and spiralling down the dark pit of obsession. i… can’t… help… it..!

i can’t say i don’t enjoy it, though. i’ve always loved fiddling with scissors, coloured paper, etc. i didn’t take up art in jc for nothing you know. (eh wait, i DID take it up for a reason – it was the bloody easiest subject to score, ha ha.)

meanwhile, there’s just something therapeutic about cutting up pieces of paper and getting cramps in your hand after the fiftieth piece. yeah yeah, they may only be for little kids who’d most likely carelessly toss away my handiwork within a mere nanosecond with barely a glance.

but my obsession for the little details is somewhat of a debilitating disease, that reared its ugly head at its peak some three years ago when i was preparing for That Wedding. now That, was pure madness. phew~

ok. i’ll have to let go a bit, and loosen the grip on those scissors.

… as soon as i’ve finished that fifty-first (or fifty-oneth, as some would say) piece…

now, where’s that LOOOONG ‘To Do’ list of mine…?

*gah!*

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on another note, they say we melayus are NOT making enough babies this year.

HUH? YOU SURE OR NOT??

TODAY reported that for the first time, Malays gave birth to fewer babies than were needed to replace their population last year. The replacement rate has been pegged at 2.1 and according to figures released yesterday, the fertility rate of Malays fell to 2.07… There were 37,500 births which is an increase of 0.9 per cent compared to 2004 but well below the 60,000 or so babies needed to replace the population.

so we need 60,000 or so babies, huh? hmm *whips out abacus*… that would take 60,000 wombs and eggs, or less if you factor in twins/triplets/sextuplets. oh, and a WHOLE LOTTA sperm. (but please eh, si dektu yang terperuk dalam jail, we don’t need anymore of yours, ok. sor-ry.)

and i thought we’re doing quite well, from the record number of babies i’ve visited and pregnancies (and re-pregnancies, if there’s such a word, heh) galore i’ve heard about this year alone.

after a whole year of repeatedly being asked when my next one will be, i may actually be running out of time and excuses.

speaking of which, my body has also sent me a “signal”. last friday, actually. the Full Moon FINALLY arrived, after a long period of absence. (or rather, a long absence of period, har har.)

it’s almost as if there’s an egg-timer (pun intended) in there or something. the timing really couldn’t be better, because we’d made a decision to start The Weaning Process right after his first birthday. periods, for the uninitiated, cause dips in milk supply, something i hadn’t gone through, thanks to the monthly no-shows this whole year.

so yeah, we’ll finally crack open our first tin of formula come monday (i think).

hmm, does it call for a celebration and fanfare, you think? ;p

i’m not sure how we’ll take to it, and which of us will have withdrawal symptoms. sometimes, it’s as if the boobies are his drugs. “macam ketagih,” says mum, chuckling as he buries his face on my chest after a day at work away from him, not about to be swayed by anyone else who tries to lure him off my lap.

who the “ketagih” one is, is your guess.

i remember writing that i wish for the day he’d run up to me when i come home from work and bulldoze me to the ground with a loud “MUMMY!”

i guess i got my wish after all. come 7pm, his oma would say out loud “mummy balik! mummy balik!”, he’d turn his head towards the door where i’ll be standing, and he’d scrunch up his face and grin before trotting over with a “mmMA!” and throw his arms around my legs.

the feeling is – FWAH.

so yeah, my one year of TBF – no regrets. at all.

sometimes i wonder, will i be able to do this all over again when the second (or third??) comes along? will i have the same energy and drive?

i have friends (and an aunt) who feel they’ve ‘shortchanged’ their subsequent children with a “penat lah, tak kuasa” stance, after they’ve been all gungho with TBF the first time round.

but, i guess i’ll only know when i cross the bridge.

meanwhile, honey… bottoms up!

and here’s to MORE melayu babies to come… watch out, chingjiapore! (which was really the original topic of this entry, wasn’t it?)

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